Perseverance

[Amber]

"I've hit a new low." Came the slight murmur from the leader's den as the orange she-cat sighed deeply. It had been several moon since her little enertaining day with Jetstreak, and now she was regretting it. Why did she have to give in to him? She loved him so much, it was hard to not give in.
Amberstar's atitude to everything had not been the best the day she began to feel like something on a Thunderpath had hit her. Everything had changed just a moon ago. She woke up feeling horrible and to top things off her stomach had began to bulge out. Just what she needed...It was at least bearable then, now it was growing more and more of a pain to try and not yowl every time she layed down to take one of her hourly naps....Even when she had those the naps the kits would decide to have fun and squirm as much as possible. She had a new found mind for all queens who went through this. How could they do it? Amberstar was one to enjoy running around, and hunting, but lately she had retreated to her den, not wanting visitors or to do anything. How could she when everytime she stood up she felt so weighted down?
Her emerald eyes were glancing at a small mouse she had gotten herself the night before...while everyone else had been asleep. The entire creature was in the same spot it had been then, not a bite taken from it. How could she eat when she felt so misreable?
Once she had noticed her stomach beginning to bulge she decided to stay in her den, acting as if she had caught something, leaving Spiritheart to do all the work. She knew that the time was coming for Willowkit to be apprenticed, but she didn't know if she had the strength, or the willpower to face her clan.
Amberstar sighed once again, and began poking at the mouse with her paw, trying to decide if she should eat it or just let it be.

[Azalea]

Jetstreak moped around the camp, avoiding everybody and everything.
Why was he such an idiot? Letting his own stupid personal desires get in the way of the Clan! WindClan needed Amberstar, and now she couldn't help them, all because of him.
There hadn't been a minute since that fateful day where Amberstar hadn't flashed through his mind, coupled with his worries about her well-being.
She probably wasn't sick, it was probably her pregnancy. Pregnant! He supressed a shudder at the thought.
What if they looked like him?
He couldn't quite get that out of his head.
For obvious reasons, Jetstreak hadn't seen Amberstar in a long time. It'd look pretty suspicious if a random warrior just went into the supposedly sick leader's den for a prolonged period of time.
To top it all off, Spiritheart was strutting around like he owned the place. Stupid idiot.
Jetstreak swore softly under his breath.
He couldn't stand this much longer. He had to see her.
So he passed Spiritheart, meowing casually, "I wonder if Amberstar's okay. I heard that her disease isn't contagious. I'd better go check on her."
Holding his breath, he approached the den, dread making him feel rather nauseous.
The black tom poked his head in. "Amberstar?" he meowed softly, scanning the room for the she-cat he knew so well.
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[Amber]

Amberstar's usual bright emerald eyes were dull and full of anger...and sadness.
Maybe it was time to face the clan, tell them about everything. Maybe she should...no she wouldn't tell them just yet.
The only good thing about this all is she hardly heard from Spiritheart, only hearing words every now and then about the clan. A daily rundown of everything...That was her only connection to the world outside her den.
Lately her dreams had been of Jetstreak, the one cat she was longing to see, yet not longing to see. She wanted to see him just to see him at times, at other times she wanted to claw off his head. When she first heard a voice from outside, she thought it was Jetstreak at first, but then as a few moments passed by she shrugged off the thought. It lingered at her for a while until she finally sighed.
"Jetstreak? Come in..." came her reply, slow and out of breath. Her back was turned to the entrance of the den, so that if someone actually came in, her stomach would not be the first thing visible. "About time." she murmered adding onto her previous words.

[Azalea]

"Amberstar?"
Jetstreak entered the den, shoulders slumped.
He caught sight of her and rushed over.
"Amberstar! Oh, Amberstar, I'm so sorry! About everything! I would've visited but Spiritheart was keeping his eye on me and if I had gone into your den he would've known something was going on and he thinks you're sick and contagious and..."
He clamped a paw over his mouth for a few seconds before releasing it. His voice was quiet when he continued.
"If you want to kill me or kick me out of the Clan or something like that, go ahead. I'm a stupid, selfish, greedy idiot and deserve whatever I get. Just tell the Clan you got raped or something. I'm sorry."
He turned to leave.
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[Mirepaw]

(Sorry to interrupt (>.>), but it's... question time! Would Dreamwolf know of the situation at this point?

And other question: Where is everyone else? -_-)

[Amber]

((As to Dreamwolf, I say it would be perfectly alright of her knowing. I mean what would a leader do without the meddie? XD
And that is how we shall know about the poor little kits with issues...

As for the other question...I wish I could answer that.))

Amberstar slightly smiled at the sight of the tom. Oh how she had missed him dearly. It was the first time she had smiled in quite some time now. "For one it is best Spiritheart thinks that. It will keep him out, and everyone else for that matter." she meowed keeping her emerald eyes on him. "I've missed you more than anyone could imagine."

Listening to his next set of words made her heart sink. How could she even think about doing any of those things to the cat she loved. "And where do you think you are going?" she asked, a bit of a playful gleam in her eye. "I think that I shall do none of those things, I love you, and that will never change." she began. "Besides, you promised you would be here for our kits, and I don't want them to grow up knowing their father was banished from the clan." Amberstar motioned with her tail for him to come and lay down by her.
"They need to hear your voice." she purred.

[Azalea]

Jetstreak let out a sigh. Whether it was relief, joy, or disappointment one could not tell.
"Can you believe that, after all I've put you through, I love you too?"
[/twilight quot'd]
He lay down next to her, pressing himself against her side.
"Dreamwolf will no doubt be here soon. What are you going to tell her, Amberstar? The truth? Lies? I'll back you up in any decision you make, even if you decide to blame me."
He let out another sigh, a contented one now, and stared at the stone wall, eyes misty and distant. Almost as if he could read her curiosity, he decided to voice his thoughts.
"I wonder," he began hesitantly, carefully measuring her reaction, "if our kits will have any...quirks or be...special in some way. I mean, you're the leader of a Clan. Will StarClan punish us for what we've done?"
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[Mirepaw]

(Dreamwolf is a he. XD)

The ticked tabby ran his golden eyes across the piles of herbs, neatly organized - and stuffed at the back of the dens. But that was a good sign, for it meant that the majority of the supplies had not been needed anytime recently. Sure, there were the normal occurrences - an apprentice getting a thorn in their foot or a cat with a bit of a cough - but nothing serious. And though for a reason that probably wouldn't have gotten much praise, that was how Dreamwolf liked it.

But he looked through his piles again to make sure he had everything he might need. He nodded to himself, satisfied that his stock was full enough. So instead of heading out of the camp, he leisurely made his way towards Amberstar's den.

He paused outside, hearing Jetstreak and Amberstar conversing inside. "Amberstar?" he called to announce his presence, slightly impatient but not wanting to interrupt if the leader was having an important conversation.

(You just love foreshadowing, don't you. =P)

[spiritheart]

Spiritheart glanced at Jetstreak as he passed, ears laid back, waiting for the usual snide remark. It never came. A simple, honest sentence stating his motives. This sparked off the white tom's curiosity, and his pinkish eyes held emotions of confusion and perhaps the slightest hint of hope.
"Maybe Jetstreak isn't as bad as I thought. I'm a Deputy for Starclan's sake, I was just seeing the bad side of him."
Spiritheart's instincts told him otherwise.
Amberstar hadn't been out of her den for a while, and she always seemed to lay with her back facing the den entrance. How peculiar.
A thought wandered into the albino cat's mind, but he quickly brushed it away.
"Amberstar wouldn't do that...would she?"
Acting upon the spur of the moment, he doubled back around the camp in a wide circle, and sat behind his Leader's den, ears pricked and paws folded underneath him.
A snippet of conversation reached his ears just before Dreamwolf interrupted.
'Kits...Punish us for what we've done'
Spiritheart leaped to his paws, wide eyed.
"It all makes perfect sense!"
He hissed to himself, ears once again laid flat in surprise.
Of course Jetstreak didn't want to admit anything. He was trying to keep him from spreading rumors, which could in turn get both of them kicked out of the clan.
"Why would Amberstar believe that I'd do such a thing...?"
Surprise turned to disappointment. Bitter and sour, coursing through his body.

[Amber]

((I love forshadowing, it is so much fun!))

Amberstar had no doubt of her love for this cat. It made her heart fill with joy as he spoke of him loving her.
Feeling the warmth of his fur turned her dull eyes bright. This is what she had been waiting for, just the feel of their pelts together once again.
She tilted her head as she thought about the question. What would she tell Dreamwolf? Finally after a moments thinking she spoke. "I will tell Dreamwolf the truth, we need at least one cat to know, other than ourselves. Besides, Dreamwolf is the medicine cat, he deserves to know what is going on. There is one other cat that we need to tell before anyone else, also. I would like you to tell this cat, but only if you want to. Spiritheart needs to know the truth." she said softly.

"I sure hope that StarClan will not punish our kits for something we did. I couldn't bear to stand to see if any of our kits were somehow 'special'." she murmered.

"Jetstreak, I forgot to tell you...I have a brother. The day that we last saw eachother, I met with him. It turns out I am half clan. My mother was a WindClan cat, and my father was a RiverClan cat. I would like him to know about our kits also. I don't see how we never caught onto it before. Our pelts are so similar, and our pasts are the same." Her voice trailed as she heard the voice of Dreamwolf.

"Here goes nothing." she murmered in Jetstreak's ear before meowing a slight greeting and then a 'Please enter' to the medicine cat.

[Azalea]

OoC- -curses loudly- Sorry!

Jetstreak nodded, wincing slightly at her remark.
"I guess we should tell Spiritheart. He'll hate me forever, but oh well. I deserve all the hate I get. And it's not like he loves me right now anyway. Stuck-up furball. He is the deputy, though, I guess."

At the brother comment his eyes widened.
"A brother? You're half-Clan?"
Apparently dear Jetstreak hadn't ever suspected that one not completely and purely Clanborn could ever have a high position or rule the Clan.
"Well, of course he needs to know. He'll be an uncle." he meowed, composing himself.

At her summons to Dreamwolf he shifted slightly away from her, until their pelts no longer touched and it looked like they were just having a completely normal conversation.
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[Mirepaw]

Hearing Amberstar's summonings, the gray tabby promptly walked into her den, halting directly after having crossed the threshold. His eyes flicked between the two cats inside, and he extended no greetings other than a slow blink - which was most likely unrelated, anyway. He stared at Jetstreak for a little while longer, contemplating and enjoying the feeling of tension in the den.

"It's not wise to stand so close to a cat with an undiagnosed illness," said the medicine cat at last, his voice as bare as his eyes. He remained near the entrance of the den, tail swishing for side to side lazily, showing no signs that he was going to proceed to do anything at all. He simply stood there, his gaze gradually shifting to the back of the den, almost as if he was a forgetful elder or distracted kit.

[Azalea]

"Well..." Jetstreak shifted uncomfortably, unsure if he should leave Amberstar to break the news or if he should begin.
"I doubt that it's contagious. I mean, everyone would be sick by now if it was contagious, right?" he meowed, chickening out.
"And you're not that bad, right, Amberstar? She's been dying for some company."
Oops. Was 'dying' the best word to use in front of a medicine cat?
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[spiritheart]

Spiritheart walked casually out from behind Amberstar's den, looking as nonchalent as was possible. His pelt was slightly ruffled, which gave away his surprise, although it could have been something else to any other cat.
Stopping outside the den entrance, he stole a glance in, but was only met by the sight of Dreamwolf's behind. The tom's ears were alert as he turned away in defeat; so much for overhearing.
His thoughts wandered to Nia, and the deputy sat down at the fresh-kill pile, eyeing it's contents disappointedly. More patrols, perhaps? No, the clan were doing as much as they could. But of course Amberstar couldn't suggest anything...
Spiritheart blinked confusedly. So much to do! And so little cats to carry those things out.
'Jetstreak?'
He was the only cat Spiritheart hadn't bothered to ask for. Maybe he didn't want to speak to him. Maybe he was scared of him. After all, Jetstreak was a formiddable cat.
The white tomcat stood up, and made his way back to Amberstar's den, clearing his throat outside it.
"Jetstreak? I'd like to speak to you for a moment."

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[Azalea]

"What, Spiritheart?" called Jetstreak, irritated.
"We're kind of discussing a subject of some importance here. Can it wait?"
Sure, Spiritheart was the deputy and all, but Amberstar was the leader.
And this was about her welfare.
He glanced at Amberstar, hoping she would forbid him to go out to talk to Spiritheart.
There were things more important than patrols.
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